Jeff Bikes China

Words for Jeff
If you want to post a message for Jeff that all can read, email Jeff at jeffbikeschina@yahoo.com, under the Subject line "Post".

Posted: Fri, 17 Sep 2004 15:13:07That many shots to the head, I'm surprised you even remember being in Philly. Your weakness still embarrasses me.
Lap dances - $400
Cheese steak - $6
Flyers Tickets - $200
Beer - $600
Parking the rental car 'on top' of the No Parking sign - Priceless.

Wasn't that your 30th? The story of your Italian friend, and the bone-hawk monk, reminded me of that trip. I don't care if you like my shoes, at the urinal it's eyes forward - freak! P.S. - Where's my Opium?

Cheers ... Hedges

Memories of Philly, didn't they win in overtime on a penalty shot? They still didn't fix that sign a year later!!! A warning to all 29 year olds, avoid Nathan and Brian on your 30th B-day. As for the opium, it got delayed in Bangkok as the monks there wanted to check the quality...

Posted: Mon, 30 Aug 2004 16:04:51
based on the trivia section of the web page.
specifically #3C. I believe Matt is afraid to golf with me.
Matt is this true?
or do you think you are golfing so well that it would be a waste of your time.

Posted: Wed, 25 Aug 2004 15:11:04
Nice Pics Heffy.
I was kinda confused as you and the archery target look alot alike.
shall we send you a razor.
Damn that che hat must reek.

The anonymous postee can only be that of Potter the great Notre Dame Hunchback lover. Or maybe Craig. Anyway I had to leap from the wall to catch the arrow in my neck but this is easier to do at high altitudes. I miss you brother and hope you are taking good care of the Fugi!!!

Posted: Tue, 17 Aug 2004 10:31:28
Jeff, in regards to Five-O being concerned for your well being. We (Me,Rod and Todd, Bubba and Potter and Craig) have sent advance pictures of the towel cart incident. (anybody wants to see these pics please request at colinm@pacificpos.com). with a note for locals to be on the lookout for the likes of you.

Did you get the Lay's? I sent them care of the Dali Lama.
We are also thinking of sending you one of those big fluffy old lady bike seat covers.(let us know)
Matt lets go golfing.
Miss you Bro.

In response to the Five O.....the towel cart incident was one of the greater moments in my life and I hope you speak of it in high regard. I can't find the Dalai Lama anywhere so I met the Panchan Lama and tried to kick his ass. That didn't go to well so I settled for some Tibetan home cooking which laid me to rest for a day and a half - man I could go for a steak at the Keg!!!

Posted: Wed, 4 Aug 2004 17:13:30
G
if you want to impress the local ladies, tell them:

In response to Mr. Senger.....
I respect your trying to make my trip more interesting, but I haven't the nerve to show anyone of the female gender this little message. I can only assume it means something like 'I foreigner with big cock' - anyway sorry to get sappy but I have gal who I love very much. But great to hear from you - we will have to go for a couple of beers when I get back. This trip is truly amazing....

Posted: Sun, 18 Jul 2004 17:45:36
So you finally rode your bike long enough to develop saddle sores. Technically speaking the sores are a subterranean pimple and the cure is through hygiene. The best way to prevent them is to wipe the postrate area with rubbing alcohol before putting on clean shorts and after evacuating. I don't know what the availability of rubbing alcohol is, but pimple soap is a so so subsititute. As for your hands going numb may I suggest a little hard work and some tissue for your tears. Shut up and ride. Oh ya I'm towing Lava around in a wheelbarrow straped to my bike just so you don't have any ideas of putting the hurt on me when you get back. Brat

Thanks Brat - or is it Bret.... typo's suck eh! Well the rubbing alcohol only gave me a headache. I bought another bottle and found it works better if you rub it on your ass. As for the tears I hold them back as the Chinese laugh at me when I cry. I think you will always have a bit of an edge when it comes to riding but I intend to punish you as best I can when I get home. Oh and better to walk Lava, you can see what happened to Jet (kidding).

Posted: Mon, 12 Jul 2004 12:03:03
Matt, lets go golfing. oh...Hi Jeff. Colin.

Posted: Fri, 9 Jul 2004 12:08:04
Hey Geek!!

Man, I really do love reading your posts...they're so entertaining and descriptive!! Wanted to let you know that I got your postcard last week...thank you so much!! Awesome pagoda, I hope you're taking lots of pics of those!! Amazing architecture out there!! I hope your ass starts to feel better...saddle sores really suck!! Slow down and enjoy the sights...you never know when you'll be back so don't miss anything
cool. Besafe and have a great time!!

Always thinking about you!
Heather :-)

Hey geekette, it sounds like the cd is corrupt sohow but it was a copy and I have already sent another cd of different pictures. Ass feels better as I stopped in Xi'an for about six days - thanks for the concern though- haha

PS - Dave says Hi too!!!

Posted: Wed, 07 Jul 2004 22:57:26
I just can't picture you biking all over China, the last vivid memory I have of you is peeking through the nursery door with Michele, watching your mom breastfeeding you! Sounds like a great trip, I love your commentaries, they're hilarious. Is there anything else to drink in China or do they only have BEER? Take care. Sandi Braico (Berg)

Sandy!!! Wow, how are you doing?? I heard you had a baby boy - congrats. I guess you probably aren't getting much sleep these days. Yes the do have alternatives to beer, poisened water or this kind of rice wine which is beyond disgusting. Actaully they have street vendors that have coolers full of drinks and ice cream and they are everywhere. Even in the middle of nowhere, so you always a few KM from getting a drink... thanks for writing!!!

Posted: Wed, 7 Jul 2004 20:58:01
Jeff, your trip sounds so amazing - I can't wait to see the photos. What an awesome adventure you are on - it's very inspiring! As for the numb hands - it's your back, try pulling your shoulders down and back, it should help (massage would be good too) Take it easy, we miss you (I know, hard to believe)
michele

Thanks, I got a couple of massages and lowered the seat which has helped but I have a pinched nerve sort of around the shoulder blade which is probably the cause. I miss you a great deal and because I am cycling I think about you and Bret quite often. We should do a Tour of France next year??

Posted: Wed, 7 Jul 2004 12:10:21
Hey Jeff - I found the Ultimate High (the book...) and read it - can't say it inspired me to go to China but he definitely set some lofty goals (pun intended if desired).

Glad to hear you're slowing it down some to enjoy what is around. I do look forward to your posts.

Take care!

Kelley (as in Barnard)

Goran was a very unique idividual to say the least and I am glad you read the book. I am also happy for the advice you gave me - always carry around toilet paper!!!! haha it's so true!!! I hope you and your daughters are doing great and thanks for writing. As I mention to Tom, it means a lot to hear from people while I'm out here!!

Posted: Wed, 7 Jul 2004 07:31:12
Jeff
I am enjoying your trip. Not many people quit a good job to fullfill their dreams. Hats off to you. How many people are with you on your trip? I spoke to Vivian last evening. Sounds like things are going OK for her. Anyway, just thought I would drop you a few words of support and a few atta boys. Take care and keep the writing going. I look forward to your next posting. Safe travels.
Thomas A. Ruddiman

Hey Tom, thanks for the encouragement! It means a great deal to hear from you and I will take the atta boys as believe some days I need em badly... Cheers!!!

Posted: Fri, 2 Jul 2004 21:24:47
matt whats uo with the posts? you gotta post the posts? werd

Posted: Tue, 29 Jun 2004 21:22:15
Jeff, we love reading your stories but hey careful on the politics. You're in China - freedom of expression is why we are lucky to live where we do.... Michele

Oh we only talk about Mao and the cultural revolution, it's my form of re-eductation for the re-educated.

Posted: Tue, 29 Jun 2004 15:48:37
Jeff I need you to come back right now!!!
Craig is here on Friday and my liver is quaking.!!!!
I think I will recruit Potter to help with the Bastard.
Saw a Licence plate last week that said ...MA!!!
LOL
I got you some wavy Lays but I ate them. I'll try again soon.

You ate my 'Lays' - well no rest for the wicked. Extend the Ontarian's stay!

Posted: Sun, 27 Jun 2004 06:49:24
We don't know what kind of hand signals your using so we will send you some Cantonese/Mandarin slang. Yanse lang!! Mud lun yeah? Stop ordering the chef special no matter how cute he looks (inside joke with Colin and Ryan). We will share in due time after you conquer the big hill nearer the end of your journey. Please bring me an empty bottle from the backside of Mt. Everest.

Remember to yell you geek. It is the method of communication to enforce your will (as you found out with the cabby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) As always, safe journey, plenty of laughs, and grab some "bo ba."
Dan & Ryan

I just laughed my ass off when I read this. As for the words of advice, the dialect keeps changing so nothing I learn seems to make any sense to them. I'll look for some empties at everest but really, you guys should be the experts at collecting empties (cheap shot - sorry). Miss you guys.....

Posted: Thu, 24 Jun 2004 15:38:51
Hey Geek!!
Just finished reading your updates!! Your adventure sounds awesome! Iactually could picture myself there seeing what you were seeing...yourstories are very descriptive, although the grammar and spelling are a bitdistracting but I always seem to understand what you're trying to say. Whatan excellent experience to have!! Keep the updates coming - I can hardly wait to see pics of the Wall...
I'm so proud of you for setting your mind to something and actually doing it!! Too bad you didn't put that kind of effort into your work!!! hahaha...I miss you around here!! There's no one else to pick on!

Take care of yourself and have a great time!!

Cheers,
Heather :-)

In response to Heather, I apologize for the grammer and mistyping, yahoo doesn't have a spell check I am aware of. Anyway I'm glad you are enjoying the stories, I got a couple of good ones.

Posted: Wed, 23 Jun 2004 10:30:10
Hey Jeffy!
Sounds like your having a blast! I love the website! I will be in Vancouver in the beginning of July. I will miss you there this year, as I am staying in a hotel with great Laundry hampers (Inside Ontarian drunkeness stuff). Anyways, I am glad to see you going after a dream. You said you were gonna do this, and you are. Hats off to you bro, and take care. (I hope you took a lifejacket from the plane!)

Thank you Craig, it's too bad I couldn't be towel boy this year, however Mark Potter seems ready to move to the next level. Have fun in Van....

Posted: Fri, 18 Jun 2004 12:11:18
Okay, am I the only one reading this stuff and wondering how you're going to last 6 months? Have you figured out the chinese words that mean "crazy westerner" are yet? So what are you eating (besides KFC)?
Michele

In response to my sisters e-mail, the KFC is different, it is the Chinese KFC, so really it's local if you know what I mean. I haven't been called 'crazy westerner' either, well at least to the best of my knowledge. Actually whenever I get an English menu, I write down what I like in pinyan and Chinese characters (don't laugh). It actually works and they like the Chinese Characters, I can tell by the way the chef is usually sharpening his knife when he looks in my general direction.
G